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• Feature Article: Ten Simple Ways NOT To Get Tenure
Ten Simple Ways NOT to Get Tenure
The following list of ways to avoid tenure is by no means
exhaustive. If you want to add some others, I will post them
in later issues of this newsletter.
-
Avoid having a passion for your area of specialization.
If you do have passion, hide it. This will take care of
most of the remaining items.
-
Be aloof when around colleagues or students, either in
your own institution or when at conferences. Socializing
can be such a timewaster, can’t it?
-
When preparing to teach a class, spend hours preparing
each one, jamming as much information in as possible.
It’s important that your students admire how much you know.
-
Read your lectures; read them as fast as you, in order
to fit in all that information. You’re not there to entertain
the students. Besides, you learned this material the hard
way, why should it be fun for them?
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Let a couple of years go by before you publish anything.
You need time to get settled. You’ll have plenty of time
before that tenure committee meets.
-
Keep all your thinking and writing under wraps. If you
reveal your ideas to peers or to more senior colleagues,
they might criticize or steal them.
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When writing a paper, be sure to have read (and memorized,
if possible) every last article on your subject or
anything related to your subject before you begin your
first draft.
-
On second thought, skip the first draft. Try to write a
perfect paper the first time. Start by editing each
sentence at least 3 times before going on to the next.
-
Don’t bother looking for a mentor. You can figure it all
out by yourself. Besides, once they get to know you,
they might not think that highly of you.
-
Why look at the promotion and tenure guidelines at your
institution? They’re pretty much the same everywhere.
You’ll cross that bridge when you come to it (if there
is still a bridge when you get there.)
If you follow all 10 of these steps to the letter,
you will be absolutely assured of NEVER getting tenure.
If, however, you DO wish to get tenure, keep reading these
newsletters and the articles at Academic
Ladder!
© Gina Hiatt, PhD.
Gina is a dissertation
and tenure coach.
She helps academics, from grad students wondering about their
dissertation topic to faculty members who want to maintain a
high level of research and writing, to reach their goals more
quickly and less painfully.
 Ready to finish your dissertation?
Coaching can help you complete it more quickly with less pain.
Call or write Gina about individual or group coaching.
Overwhelmed with the responsibilities of being a junior
professor, or worried about getting tenured? Call or write
Gina about individual coaching or her writing/time management
groups.
Stay tuned to this newsletter, which will give you hints, reminders
and practical suggestions for staying on track and creating the career
you deserve. And check out the writing/time management groups on our
website!
Ask the Coach
Have a question that you would like to have addressed in this
newsletter? Send it to questions@academicladder.com and you could see your question answered in the next issue!
R & D Team
Want to be on my R & D team? I'm creating two workbooks,
one for grad students, and one for professors. If you would like to give
input and insight on
what to include, or critique a page or two, just send
me an email with R & D in the subject line. Include your name, let me know if you
are student or faculty, and any other details you'd care to share. Thanks!
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The Academic Ladder
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"The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking
new landscapes, but in having new eyes." - Marcel Proust
 Book of the week:
 Getting
Things Done by David Allen
A couple of my clients swear by this book. I especially
like his chapter on "Getting Projects Creatively Underway" with
his Five Phases of Natural Planning. I also like his criteria for choosing
what action
to take in this moment. I suggest that everyone who has trouble moving
forward get this book -- it's available used for 7.95, and it's turned
at least one dissertation around. Read
more reviews!
RESOURCES, REVIEWS & RECOMMENDATIONS
Your
answers will be anonymous. If you think of any other responses to add
to the survey, please write me. Look for the results in the Academic
Ladder Newsletter in coming weeks!
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